honey bunches of taint.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
So idk if it's because I'm working out again or the coke, but I hit my target weight today. Whaaaat uuuup. Come and get me thanksgiving.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Every day I wake up and there is no spectacular morning wood waiting for me I get so sad.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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