Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
my 12 year old sister just told me how admirable it was that i felt comfortable going out with my friends dressed "like that"
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
I took it upon myself to take one shot of tequila to have an excuse for hitting on my not-single coworker. It worked.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
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