I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
So the TSA can feel me inside and out in front of 40 people, but they catch me fucking in the bathroom 20 feet away and all of a sudden their the decency police
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
