its 9am. i just got home. spent 6 hours blowing him in a closet last night
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
I woke up this morning with a wristband and I thought I went to the hospital last night I actually went ice skating instead
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Like I wasn't going to make out with the hot Australian sitting next to me at the Portland blazer game?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
