Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
There is only so much cookie dough and masturbating I can handle in one night.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
It's nice out. . But after I almost put a bag of chips in the microwave to make nachos. ..I figured it best to not venture too far from the couch
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
Btw when I was saying "fuck you" I meant it like "be quiet beautiful princess"
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
He's balder, I'm skinnier. I win. I. Win.
Randomize
