brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
im having a threesome with these popsicles
while 90% of the female population goes to worship a fictional character tonight at midnight, I will be taking advantage of having the bars ALL TO MYSELF.
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I cannot believe this. A potential 2016 Olympiad wants my vag. To which I respond "GO FOR THE GOLD"
you have to be that girl in the audience holding up the sign that says i fucked the shit out of you
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
ATTENTION: just found out of have strep. if we have had sex in the past week, might wanna go to the doctor. if you plan to have sex with me in the next 20 days go buy some condoms. stupid antibiotics.
Randomize
