You know what, matt, a girl is not really that interested in a relationship if she goes down on you the first time she meets you
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
just shottied a beer can with a pumpkin carver. i love October.
I'll be honest, not actually surprised to find half a Big Mac box and bits of broken security glass by the sofa.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
Get ready for me I'm full of tequila and I want to be full of you next
Randomize
