Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
Changing from sweatpants to jeans at 3 in the afternoon makes the day seem so much more productive than it actually was.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
you dragged me by my throat over to the shots. this is a new level of alcoholism..
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Whore. There is deli meat in my wallet.
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
