I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
For the record I fully support drunken you in most social situations... Just not charity events.
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
My family will be here in an hour and I'm deciding between doing my makeup or saying fuck it and wearing what's left of last night's...
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
If you kill yourself you won't get to feel that feeling when you have a good shit in the morning. Arent you gonna miss that?
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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