We won't sleep together?
You can't special order awesome
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
after that bj i gave him, i could fucking punch his mom and he wouldn't give a shit
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