just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
A very small part of me wants you to appreciate me for more than just my breasts. But the rest of me is breasts.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
This must be what defeat feels like to Tom Brady today. I bet he wishes he could barf up all of his bad decisions from yesterday, too.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
Jelly. This is your "are you still alive" text. Any response will do.
Hey I found a cat!
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
