Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Dude they are making elephants out of dollar bills. I'm way too high for this
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
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