just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Thanks to you I can't show my boobs tomorrow for the interview.
You came in wearing a whipped cream bikini what did you think would happen
Randomize
