I wanna bring you to show and tell
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
Her best guy friend really had a thing for her all along.... Now we're back together and he's gone Dawson's Creek with his away messages.
turns out the guy i was dating because he was a cop was not actually a cop. i learned this as he got arrested by real cops.
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
Before he gave me the breathelizer, he told me to "blow like you're blowing your boyfriend". I like him. My tax dollars are well spent
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
There's wax on my nightstand, my sheets look like Christmas, and my vagina feels like it got into a fight. All signs of a good night
Randomize