no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Listen you let me know what you're doing after drinking rum punch all morning
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
Randomize
