It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
two words: eviction party
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
just got home. some guy on my porch is tryin to show me his balls. no more parties at my apartment.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
Randomize
