We all just poured out a sip of our drinks for you. One for our pussy whipped homie.
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
you won't ask to borrow his earbuds because you think it's gross, but you'll have sex with him?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I need you to stand in the corner and ref this threesome. Wear stripes.
You almost make it sound as if getting an education to further your career is more important than beer and tacos.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
I'm taking a shit break of discontent as a personal protest
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
He fucked me on the hood of my car outside his work, and now I'm paranoid that the doggie day care next door might have security cameras.
Ive realized that in order for me to understand math, my professor has to be hot.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
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