The tricky part is not getting sand in any orifices. Or is the plural orifi? Orifi don't, we'll both be unhappy...
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
I went from naked with lasts nights hookup to Ihop in 6 minutes flat
I think that's a new house record
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
Randomize
