Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
Drinking heavily at 3pm and about to rescue a 30lb street turtle. Dont even bother attempting to rise to this level bitch
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
