Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I got really high with eric & scott.. they're discussing why words sound the way they do.. it's going to get messy
There's banana everywhere and your hamster may or may not have stayed the night in the microwave...
The doctor asked me what height I fell from to hurt my back.. I answered keg height
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
If I take diet pills with my edibles I'll be a perfect person
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
I now know he's been cheating for a while. I also know HER name, address, phone number, Facebook account, religion and zodiac sign. I feel like I'm earning my restraining order. Point is, never fuck over a librarian.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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