You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
mom in a round about way told me to either donate my eggs or become a surrogate bcuz I need money.
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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