After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
At the hospital, the nurse kept telling me that i either had appendicitis, a tubular pregnancy, or an ovarian cyst. I kept asking if i could just have chlamydia instead...
The one from last night got me a whole floor of Eskimo Brothers. There was a celebration of high fiving as I left
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
Okay Im going to go have some sex apparently. I hope this chick is prepared the zero effort Im going to put into it.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I just set the shake weight record at the bar. 20 mins of that crap and drinking beer through a straw will get the job done. I also bet the bartender 100 bucks I could go shot for shot with him. The date for that event is TBA.
Drinking vodka in the bathtub.... If I don't make it, I thank you for your magical parts
Bad news: I found out that girl you want has a boyfriend. Good news: she'll probably cheat on him with you. Better news: after seeing the way she treats him, that's the most interaction you're going to want with her anyway. Trust me.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize