Bar closing I am hiding in the bathroom. do you think anyone will find me?
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
she said "i got this" and then fell on her face. within grabbing distance of the wall and her boyfriend
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
we started the countdown to drunken sledding this weekend.
The chick working the drive through at BK on New Years stuck her head out the window and told me there were no line ups for the bathrooms inside so i should go in there. I just kept squatting and peeing and told her it would prob help business.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Don't forget Giraffe in your car! If we show up in the same outfit without animal heads we're just gonna look weird.
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
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