I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
I would totally lead with that as a line.'So, I was on Legends of the Hidden temple as a kid.. Your place or mine?'
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
Randomize
