Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I'm about to pick up E from underneath a random doormat.......how is this remotely normal?
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I had jack at 8 am= instant drunk
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
Thank you for dog sitting, there is $60 on my desk to be spent on DRUGS AND/OR GAS ONLY not that food stuff people crave.
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
