She's JV to your varsity
If he can handle my muffin top then I can handle his front teeth.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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