careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
this is an emotional support booty call
I'm peeing on your house...you up?
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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