What did we do last night that was yellow?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
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