i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
Laziness has reached now heights if you too unmotivated to buy pot
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
So wise, so handsome, so good at oral sex.
I think i just shit in their garbage can, I'm ready for that ride u owe bro.
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
