Haha she couldn't find her dress in the morning. So she left it. How do the hell do I discreetly return that to her at work. More importantly, how did she discreetly do the walk of shame??
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
We called dibs on each other's genitals. That bond is unbreakable.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
So they found him after the wedding still dressed up in his feather boa and top hat passed out in a bush...
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize