I love having hate sex.
He's sitting on the floor holding his bracket and crying, literally crying... he just keeps saying "Kansas how could you?" over and over
finally stumbled home. 4am. made it to the bathroom and threw up. the cat came in,s aw me, looked at the vom in disgust, and then threw up too. its nice to have such sympathetic pets.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
He pointed at some girls and said "I'm gonna have sex with them girls over there", and disappeared.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
