in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Making and watching you take a mixed shot with vodka, chocolate syrup, tobasco sauce, cranberry juice, and sundried tomato juice wasnt the highlite of my night. Hearing you puking from downstairs was.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
He just invited me over to bang on a sunday afternoon. If I can make it top the time I went to a strip club on fathers day then I'll consider it a success.
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
I need to find a more reliable booty-call so I can start dating people and take it slow.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
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