...seriously? chocolate pudding? motorboating? No one has even done that to ME and i am 69 times the whore you are
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
idk wtf was in that bud but I was talking to my dead dog last night bro holy shit
fries before guys. food before dudes. shakes before dates. chips before dicks. lemon bars before football stars. macaroni before screwin' tony. what i'm saying is please come to ladies' night
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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