that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
what i'd really like is a nice helping of naked boyfriend with a side of naked boyfriend.
this hospital has no fireball
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
You leaned over to me in the elevator and whispered "how long do I have to pretend to be sober?"
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
A world without bacon flavored condoms is not one I want to live in.
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