5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
I imagine her to be like a 19th century explorer/adventurer with different boys' hearts on her wall like animal heads
Like Teddy Roosevelt
They have chocolate covered tequila candy at work. This is not a drill. May be drunk by noon.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
I just look @ having a child spit on you as another form of birth control. I think my ovaries just tied themselves in a knot.
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Randomize
