the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
The fact that we all screamed by Felicia to a bitch actually named Felicia will be a highlight of my life
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
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