If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
We ran out of toilet paper the last week, so we just took showers to pee
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
He was handing out home-made business cards that read "finger slamming bitches since 1986"\n
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
We just did a u turn on the highway to settle a dispute in a game of slug bug
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I’m going to have to rewatch all of them. Drugs, man.
Randomize
