My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Dad, is it in any way illegal for me to run around throwing handfuls of lucky charms at people tomorrow?
you're kidding right?
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
I was not drunk enough for that final.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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