If it wasnt for meatballs I would have fucking killed myself already.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I have weed and a speedo - I don't need anything else.
His roommate walked in then asked "well did you at least finish". What a way to start your birthday
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
Randomize
