Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
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