We won't sleep together?
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Jumanji is 1000% better stoned while cooking breakfast.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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