i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Mixing Powerade and white wine has been one of my better ideas.
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Please don't give away my fajitas
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
