the liability waiver did not state that i couldn't bring my bottle of wine in the bouncy castle. it did Not.
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
The beer is more important than you right now.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
Everyone knows relationships are a winter sport
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
If I slept with her my dick would come out glittery
coward.
Randomize
