i'm listening to "transmissions" by The Tea Party from like '97 and waxing my legs. fuck i'm awesome in my alone time
Omg. In the pub, there's a guy shouting at the olympic channel 'yeah! Kill that motherfucker!' we're watching figure skating.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
She walks around topless and loves making sandwiches. That's how a one-night stand turned intoa relationship
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
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