never play flip cup with pint glasses
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
you were wandering around the street for like an hour singing "nothing but socks on"..an original you wrote after the 12th shot i believe
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Come on, without my personality, I'm a pretty good one night stand.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
Randomize
