Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Apparently I told him the people made me order taco bell I didn't even want it. And then proceeded to turn off all the lights and sit at the kitchen table in the dark and told him not to look at me.
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