have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
The girls at the police department photocopied my drinking ticket and told me to frame it and hang it on my wall. Then they gave me a free muffin and told me to party smarter next time.
Just thought you should know I'm having a reunion tour of Athens this weekend. Minus the weird guy I was fucking last time.
I met her daughter,who I went to high school with on my way out this morning. She didn't seem to surprised. I love older women.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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