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Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Have you ever noticed that the cities in car commercials look really futuristic?
...did you eat that brownie?
I opened my eyes this morning, looked at the sunlight and made this hangover my bitch.
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
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