So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Fucking shoot me with this y'all shit. You were in Texas for 2months you do not have an accent Madonna
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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