Don't you send me to vm
I was being carried out of the bar, but then my friend saw Pat who just got kicked out scaling the wall to sneak back in, so he carried me back in, sat me on the bar stool, and the bartender just let us all keep drinking.
Being persistent has its perks my friend.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
I just paid a homeless man $20 for the dragon ball Z shirt he was wearing. I need to stop drinking
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
Btw, I feel the need to make sure we have no misunderstanding about this. So here goes. I'll happily mess around with you again. However, I probably won't do it while you're dressed like a creepy clown. Or any clown.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
Randomize
