we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Why didn't I see you last night!?
We made out like 4 times....I think I saw you.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
It's because of weed that I don't mind driving an hour to visit my family. And it's because of you that there's weed in my life. Thank you.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
He called yelling about whhhhhhiskey and enchiladas I heard sirens in the background last time I talked to him b
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize